Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
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