Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
