It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
