Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
