Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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