Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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