I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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