Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
