I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
