it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
