my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
