So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
