Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
no you cant smoke seaweed
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
