from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
