I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
