I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize