Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
