she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
