Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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