Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I pour the whiskey from now on
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
