no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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