i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize
