She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
