Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Are my feet made of real feet?
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
