new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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