ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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