i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
