I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
