I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
