So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
