To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
