She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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