she was so not down for the gang bang
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
