i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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