Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
