She's JV to your varsity
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Randomize