Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
