What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
