I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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