Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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