Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I'm jealous of your bromance
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Randomize