No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
