I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I could fuck to npr.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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