Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
