We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
