His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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