he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize