i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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