This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
