Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
